Over a few years poetry slowly shifted from a cathartic hobby to my primary vocation, and I was so elated by this achievement that I hadn’t registered that my relationship with writing would change. I soon found that whenever I entered a poem for private reflection or contemplation, I was more critical of the word choices and arrangements, more concerned with the writing than what the words themselves were signalling. Also, I subconsciously placed every personal writing as pending, assuming someday it might find itself in a book or a stage and was just waiting for the gem in its lines to find use. I realised I had to protect poetry by placing less pressure on it to be the sole player in every role. I had to find other ways to release my thoughts and emotions.
I was losing the very essence of why I began writing. Poetry came into my life right before my teens, it changed my brain chemistry, altered my understanding of myself in the world, it was a change that began in me and if it willed, would ripple into others. This process of unpacking my changed relationship with poetry brought on other realisations, I also needed another hobby. Thankfully I had fallen in love with cooking, by that I mean creative freedom with recipes, splashing seasoning like paint and seeing what the dish would become! Cooking aside, I still had an inclination for written expression, but a diary wouldn’t suffice for me as that is more typically a record of events, so I leaned into journaling which is more suited for deeper reflections. Journaling helped me take the pressure of the expectation of a polished end product. Taking on other interests meant when I returned to poetry, I was less fragile and demanding.
What kind of journal do I use?
1) A wellness journal to reconnect with my thoughts and highlights on a given day. 2) A calendar which I use to write down one take away from each day.
How has journaling helped me?
Journaling gave me more mental clarity, allowed me to uncover and process my inner thoughts. Reviewing a past day or week helped me make healthier decisions for the upcoming one. Journaling also boosted my discipline, it’s encouraged me to keep set times for reading, whether a book or my bible.
How should you journal?
It goes by to your individual why. Why do you need one? Then what works for your schedule? Do you desire something more rigid, or a blank book? Is it solely for your eyes or as creative inspiration. Some artists do enjoy the process of pulling from this to enrich their work. The artist Frida Kahlo used her journal as a place for personal and artistic meditation. You don’t need to pull out five journals or throw it down in the kitchen, but we do need sustainable means to express ourselves in a way that nourishes the self.